Real Pregnancy Advice from a Midwife Who’s Expecting: What New Moms Need to Know About Birth, Vaccines & Mental Health

Stevie.
May 7
6 min read

If you're navigating pregnancy or preparing for motherhood, chances are you've Googled everything from "Do I need a birth plan?" to "What does a midwife do?"—and possibly “Is it okay to take medication for nausea?” or “Am I a bad mom for struggling emotionally after birth?” You're not alone.

I sat down with Cassandra, a Calgary midwife and first-time mama-to-be, for a candid, compassionate conversation about all things pregnancy, birth, postpartum—and the guilt women often carry through it all. Her insights are refreshing, real, and just what every woman needs to

hear.

Jump To Resources Here!

Meet Cassandra: Calgary Midwife, First-Time Mom, and Women’s Health Advocate

Cassandra is part of the team at Aurora Midwifery and is expecting her first baby this June. She brings both professional expertise and personal experience into her care—something that’s made her an even more empathetic provider.

With a background in nutrition, she started her journey into midwifery by exploring fertility and pregnancy from a holistic standpoint. But once morning sickness hit, reality checked in fast. “I had all this knowledge about what to eat during pregnancy,” she laughs, “and then I lived off carbs and anything I could keep down for weeks!”

Mom Guilt - Starts Before Baby Is Even Born

One of the most powerful things Cassandra shared? How deeply ingrained mom guilt is—even before the baby is born.

Her most eye-opening experience? The intensity of early pregnancy symptoms. “I was sick until 21 weeks,” she said. “I took all the meds—Diclectin, Zofran—you name it. It’s changed how I approach nausea with clients. Now I tell them, 'Take what you need!’” Many new moms need that “permission” from their healthcare providers. As if women do not already have enough pressure from external sources, we put pressure on ourselves to be martyrs and do it all on our own. BUT, Cassandra’s approach to tell women they always have a choice (as long as it is informed) is empowering to all mothers being faced with decisions about their body and pregnancy.

Midwifery Care: A Safe Space for Informed, Empowered Choices

If you’ve ever Googled “what does a midwife do?”—here’s what makes midwifery care unique:

Longer, unrushed appointments (usually 30–60 minutes)
Continuity of care with the same provider through pregnancy, birth, and postpartum
Informed choice: You’re presented with evidence-based options and you decide what’s best
Birthplace options: hospital, home, or birth centre
Postpartum home visits (because putting on pants and driving with a newborn? No thanks)
24/7 access for urgent needs

“It’s the perfect blend of science and holistic care,” Cassandra says. “And it’s all about you having agency in your own journey.”

Midwifery Myths—Let’s Clear Things Up

✅ Can I give birth in a hospital with a midwife? Yes, and most midwifery clients in Alberta do.

✅ Can I get an epidural? 100%. Midwives support all types of pain relief.

✅ Are midwives nurses? Not in Canada—midwifery is its own regulated, 4-year degree program.

✅ Can I have a midwife and an OB-GYN? Yes, if you were initially low risk, but something in your pregnancy moves you to a higher risk category. There is often the option for midwives and OBs to “share care” of clients in this situation (for example if you develop high blood pressure in your pregnancy).

Birth Plans & the Power of Flexibility

Cassandra is planning a home water birth—but with zero pressure to “stick to the plan.”

“Hope, not expectations,” she says. “Your body and baby might have other ideas, and that’s okay. Being open and flexible is key.”

Hot Topic: Vaccines and Informed Choice – What Midwives Really Do

Vaccines can be one of the most anxiety-inducing decisions for new parents. And with conflicting voices online, it’s no wonder women are searching: “Are vaccines safe during pregnancy?” “Do I have to vaccinate my newborn?”

Cassandra gets it. She’s not here to push an agenda—she’s here to inform and empower.

“My role as a midwife isn’t to tell parents what to do,” she says. “It’s to lay out the facts, answer their questions, and support them in making decisions that align with their values.”

That’s what informed choice really means.

Cassandra personally supports routine childhood vaccinations, Hepatitis B, and MMR (measles, mumps, rubella). And she’s transparent about why:

“Take measles, for example,” she says. “It was nearly eradicated in North America thanks to

vaccines. But now it’s coming back—and that’s dangerous, especially for newborns and people who can’t be vaccinated.”

“It’s not just about individual protection,” Cassandra explains. “It’s about herd immunity. When fewer people vaccinate, the disease finds its way back in—and it puts everyone, especially the most vulnerable, at risk.”

But even with that urgency, Cassandra emphasizes one thing: she will never shame a parent for their decision.

“If a client says no to vaccines, my job isn’t to argue. It’s to make sure they had access to the facts, and then stand beside them in whatever they choose,” she says.

She encourages parents to:

Ask questions (yes, even the hard ones)
Consult reputable sources (like Health Canada, your midwife, or pediatrician)
Learn about vaccine schedules, spacing, and community risks
Understand what diseases like measles, whooping cough, or meningitis can mean for infants

Postpartum Mental Health: It’s Time to Talk About It

This is where the real stigma still lives. Cassandra is passionate about opening up this conversation—because so many women suffer silently.

There’s still so much shame around struggling mentally after birth, it’s as if we’re afraid that asking for help means we’re failing. But it doesn’t. It means we’re strong.

Let’s break it down:

🍼 Baby blues are common and typically show up around day 2–5 postpartum—think weepiness, irritability, and overwhelm. These symptoms usually fade within two weeks (and are pretty reasonable considering the circumstances).

⚠️ Postpartum depression or anxiety can show up later and hit much harder. Signs include:

Feeling disconnected from your baby
Deep sadness, hopelessness, or numbness
Intense anxiety or intrusive thoughts
Shame or fear about being a “bad mom”
Thoughts of harm to yourself or your baby

Cassandra’s message is loud and clear: You are not broken. You are not alone. And help is out there.

More women go through this than you think, but we don’t talk about it. And that silence isolates us. We need to normalize asking for help, just like we would for a physical condition. Your mental health matters—for you, your baby, and your family.

Breastfeeding, Fussy Babies & Keeping It Real

“Breastfeeding is HARD. It’s you and a tiny human learning a brand new skill together.” Cassandra shares. Many women are under the impression that breastfeeding is easy - we see this on movies and are socialized to think it is the only way to feed a baby. Yes, breastfeeding includes some natural biological processes and aspects of it are instinctual; HOWEVER (and that’s a huge however), it is still a new skill and routine for both mom and baby and takes work.

Her favorite real-life tricks:

The “magical baby hold” (arms crossed, upright, gentle bounce. See video on instagram!)
Skin-to-skin—seriously, magic for both of you.
The boob—when in doubt, nurse it out